It is not enough.....

MTo be dumbstruck, you must have the words in that head of yours...

Not always. That's why I'm quiet sometimes :)

Trying to think where I left off. Oh yeah, was a bit fed up last time I posted. But then if we all got on all the time this would be a boring place wouldn't it.

Did Weald xc the day after my last blog. Had a good one, got my best finish position yet :) which is how xc races must be judged. No point going on time. So yeah, good.

Then last week went to Pymmes parkrun. Really small run but very friendly. 3 flat laps which on paper should be fast, but I did 22.11. One stretch was definitely hard against the wind, maybe it was that cos you did it 3 times...dunno. But 1st lady and you can hate me for this if you like but I like being first :-P

I did have a hard PT session the night before, that may have impacted too.

Trained fairly well this week, swim, gym, bootcamp, intervals, and then did Gravesend floodlit 10k on Thursday night. Got the javelin train from st pancras - 23 minutes to gravesend....wow! Got picked up by club mates from station and then off to the cyclo track where the races are held. You can do 5 or 10k and when we. First arrived I thought, yeah 5k would be good! But we had already agreed we were doing 10k ......and tbh I want to run as many 10s as ican for speed endurance.

Admin could not have been simpler, handed over a tenner and my form, got a number pinned it on, ready to go :)

4 laps of 2.5k, it is floodlit but at the two extreme ends of the track it is pitch black, with little lights on sticks so you know where the path is. The course is undulating with one short hill and one longer but less steep hill.

Set off quick like always. Passed what I thought were all the women after about 500m. Just after that a woman passed me, she was going too quick for me to hang on to so I concentrated on my race.

Barry a club mate passed me before too long but I wasn't suprised, he is on great form at the minute. I tried not to let him get too far ahead. I was enjoying the course, the first dark bit was really exhilarating as it was downhill and you just had to trust the track was there, the second dark bit I hung on to the bloke in front and assumed he wouldn't run into anything :-D. 1st lap ticked over and I felt good.

Shortly after that I passed a woman who had fooled me by looking just like a bloke. It's not on is it! It was much quieter on second lap as we stretched out and on this second dark bit I had no one to follow so ended up going really wide because I couldn't tell what was path and what wasn't. Still, 2 laps ticked off. They were giving out water at the lap but I was far too cold for that! Even running.

Now it was just fun as I was counting down. I aimed to keep lap 3 as steady as I could because then I could go for it on last lap. I'd need the times to be sure but I think I did.

Ended 45.33 and second lady. Myself Cristina and Faye also got First Ladies team which meant I got 2 bottles of Merlot. Bloody result! A very good evening all in all. Especially because when I left work I could easily have gone straight home. I'm going back next month :)

Today I did Valentines parkrun as it was its third birthday. I decided to jog round as it was so windy, right up until they said GO!! Then I just raced like I always do. Had a really nice run, 21.58, happy with that.

So a good week all in all. I made an assay work that I have been trying to sort for *gulp* a year! and I am enjoying racing. Life is good when I like to race, and tomorrow is xc again :)

I have written you down....

Now, you will live forever.......

That's right isn't it. Write something on the internet and it will never go away.

Is that a reason not to do it? I don't think so. We all have our thoughts, our opinions, they are just as valid as the next persons.

I will admit I cannot stand all the motivational shit that people post on Facebook and twitter, and if you know me you will know that, but......it's your right to do it if you want. If it helps you then good. I will scroll on. My motivation comes from...well it's my business isn't it. I do think ultimately we are on our own, and whilst it's nice to have someone cheer me on, I'm going to do it whether they do or not. For me.

Oooh, that makes me remember what I had my knickers in a twist about last week, or the week before.

I sponsored 2 people yesterday, one because I am willing her on to her first marathon and she gives an awful lot. The other, yeah it's his first marathon too, he got a place so isn't obliged to fundraise, but I'msponsoring   him because I am so impressed with the way he has consistently improved.

So those reasons. I will not sponsor because someone tells me they are doing something 'mad' or 'the toughest race ever' ...... Because I know. You're doing it because you want to. You. I've been there. I wanted to do the 10 in 10. Brathay trust seems like a worthy cause, but no more worthy than hundreds of other charities. I had to get 2250 to do it. I just about did. I hated every second of fundraising. 

I suppose if I had a cause that really really mattered to me it would be different, but it wouldn't change the fact that the event i chose would be something I really wanted to do. 

So try not to pretend the ONLY reason you are doing it is for the charity. I find that to be bollocks.

I do have more people to sponsor, I just can't afford it this month cos January was too long :-D

Should talk about running now, I've done a bit.

Highlights - 10k PB at Hyde Park, 5k 2014 best at Hyde Park yesterday 21.24. Hoping this is good as I don't run well this early in the year normally. XC at Parliament Hill was great fun. Hopefully xc tomorrow will be good too.

Got a running technique course at Mile End on Tuesday, looking forward to this and hoping the tube strike doesn't scupper me. Work shouldn't as I am on a stats and research methods course all week.

Got my appraisal a week Monday when I am going to ask if I have a job after November. Fingers crossed.

Anyway right, as a wise friend of mine once said. It's only running, can we all please just try to remember that :-D