Shortest sportive ever, and Heslegraves on tour 😊

Last Sunday Andy P and myself travelled to somewhere in the Chilterns (I dunno where it was) for the Chilterns 100. I have done the medium route twice before and survived it, and we had decided that if we needed to turn off at the split point that was fine.

Much much bigger than it used to be, we eventually set off and I was in good spirits, it was going to be hard but that was a good thing. I was enjoying the scenery, and the weather was getting nicer all the time. We came to a fairly steep downhill, which was fine. At the bottom round a corner though the road was really bad and you couldn't avoid it so had a bone shaking few second going over that, thinking 'phew, nothing fell off my bike' and was freewheeling up the hill that went under a bridge glad that I had some help from the downhill. Then I needed to pedal again so stood up to pedal down and the chain came off and I was quickly on the floor. Andy and another guy stopped to get the bike off me and I got out from under it thinking, 'I'm going to be sick, need to get to the hedge' but I wasn't I was just shocked I think. My knee took most of the fall but my hip didn't do too badly either and I was so shaky I really didn't want to go on. The motorcycle marshals were ace and waited with me whilst Andy cycled back to HQ to get the car to pick me up. A few people stopped to ask the marshals when all these bikes would be gone so they could ride their horses 😊😊😊 one lady gave me her phone number in case I needed anything....or maybe she fancied me, not sure, I must have looked pretty damn ravishing 😂

Anyway, got seen by St. John's when I got back, or rather cleaned up and talked to as if I was 7 by the  old lady in a St. John's outfit, which was funny, then a bit annoying, then just....I need to go home.

We set off home but via the Olympic park so I could get back on the bike on the road track, however Andy rode it up and down the car park and it seemed the chain didn't want to stay on, no way I was getting on it so we took it to cycle surgery in Romford and left it there for exploratory surgery and a service. I then went home and laid on the sofa having cycled all of 5 miles 😀 iron woman me!!!!

I didn't run Monday and Tuesday as my knee wasn't keen on bending, and since I don't like being told what to do I know my limbs don't either so I didn't force it (this is my favourite knee, don't tell the other one!). Then, WEDNESDAY 😊😊😊😊

We flew to Lisbon, a short break I had booked to see Bruce Springsteen at the Rock in Rio festival. Seeing Bruce this year has special meaning. When I first met Chris I was actually going out with someone else, we will call him, er, Loser to protect his identity. One work night out me and Chris were talking about Bruce and the fact he was playing Wembley soon, and he said (maybe half joking I dunno) that if I got bored of Loser then I could go with him to the gig. I pretty much ditched Loser the next day, well I say that, I just never contacted him again.....how bad is that! Then I got tickets to the gig and 28 years later we are still together , but more significantly this year is our 25th wedding anniversary, so seeing the man that made it all possible twice this year is ace! (We are going agin next month)

So we arrive in Lisbon, had a bit of a pickle getting metro tickets but eventually worked it out, then got out of the metro right in front of our hotel!!! The hotel was ok but there was no need for the frosted door on the toilet 'pod' being able to see out whilst you are ahem, on the loo is most off putting and I can say I was severely inhibited by this and it's as well we were only there 2 nights 😐.

First thing we did was go off to find the venue....it was about a 3 mile walk and Lisbon ain't flat! Also the pavements are like, those little tiles....I can't think of the bloody name, but slippery and uneven, so I decided I wouldn't run there. Anyway we found the park up the top of a bloody big hill and then walked back. Actually quite enough exercise for the one day. We sussed out a nice restaurant for dinner and chose a random wine which was lovely, and then went to bed shattered.

Gig day I laid in til 7.30 then left Chris with some privacy 😀 whilst I went and used the treadmill in the gym on the 9th floor. The view was awesome but also the treadmill was ace, you could watch anything on it and I ran round some lake with loads of dog owners waving at me. How nice! There was a pool but it was about 5 meters long, there was also a sauna and that but I wasn't sure if Portuguese people did the starkers thing so I gave that a swerve. We then went off to a lovely park we had found near the hotel and sunbathed for a few hours, was bliss and my resting heart rate for that day was 34bpm. Proper relaxed, or I'm in the sixth sense and I will find out soon......but only at the end of the film when everyone else knows 😀

The festival opened at 4 so we decided to walk there again and got there around 4.30. No queues, easy to get in, no queue at the bar and proper toilets, get in! Also loads of room to sit and get comfy. Sounds ace doesn't it? Well it was but that was because nothing happened til 7 when some Portuguese glee collective came on for an hour. No idea what they were acting out but the singing was not great, ok we can deal with this. Sure Bruce will be on by nine. Then a notice came up on screen showing timings. Bruce was due to come on at 11.45 😊 ha!!! We are so English we are used to being chucked out of concerts at 11. Also my bedtime is waaaaay before that. Ah well, not like we were going to leave. Stereophonics came on at 8.30 and they were ace, mind u I might have had a few beers by then. I'm not sure many people had gone to see them though judging by the funny looks me and Chris were getting for having a jump around to them. Or maybe they were thinking we are too old for that sort of thing....

At 10 some Portuguese heavy rock band came on to lots of crowd support....I didn't like them cos the lead singer looked sinister to me, I always have good reasons for stuff.

Finally Bruce came on, and it was as we knew it would be ace (though Wembley will be letter as its his own show). The time flew and by the time he went off at 2.30 my throat was raw and my legs were very tired. So we followed the sign s for the metro so we could get back to the hotel along with loads of other people....only to find it locked. Why they had signs out I don't know, maybe to taunt us? Anyway, we had maps on my phone so we were able to navigate back but boy that bit was hard work. We finally got to bed around 4 and so my planned gym session in the morning was binned in favour of sleep in order to make the journey home more bearable 😊 a fab few days though.

Was super tired this morning still though, so I didn't swim and I didn't parkrun. I did go and get my bike though which is looking all shiny, and then did some intervals in the park which felt slow but I did them.

Now my fingers are getting bored. I expect you are too if you got this far!!!

Every day's a school day......

Alternatively, will I ever fucking learn?

Did my 6th London marathon last week. Hated it. Which is in complete contrast to last year. Why? Hmm not sure, but I suppose a shaky few months training and no real idea of what I wanted to achieve were contributing factors.

Lesson 1........ Always have a plan and know why you are doing what you are doing.

I did finish it though, even though I could happily have walked off the course many times....well I say that, I would have had to be some sort of martial arts guru to break through the crowds but you know what I mean 😊

Didn't do much all week really, except go down to the leisure centre and run a tiny bit of 401 marathon challenge mans 230 somethingth marathon. Really nice guy, and a bit of a chat with some Dag 88s which made me miss being a member 😐

Oh I did work of course and have realised that if all the projects that are lined up got their shit together and wanted to start the next day I would just have to change my name, my appearance, and dissapear. Still I'm sure loads of people have jobs like that. You just juggle and try to appear competent until you can be promoted out of harms way 😝

Anyway, yesterday was a trip to the Isle of Wight with some mates for parkrun tourism and a ride round the Island. My alarm was set for 3.30 am so I woke at 2.15 and was unable to go back to sleep. Eventually Thundercat who was trying very hard to sleep on my legs which kept tossing and turning, told me to 'just fucking get up and feed me or something, you are doing my head in!' So I did. I was being picked up at 4.15 and the time just dragged! Seriously if I worked in the small hours I would get so much more done cos those hours are loooonnnnggggg.

But eventually I was picked up, bike racked and a little trip round Dagenham to pick up Paul and Mark who were along with Andy the driver, car buddies for the day.

Conversation was surprisingly lively for that time in the morning, though I had to intervene when the blokes started discussing whether a fish would use its gills or its fins to operate a walkie talkie.

Lesson 2....... If you give men long enough in an enclosed space they will start to talk complete bollocks very quickly. 

(Fins of course, it's bloody obvious isn't it?)

Anyway, arrive at the Isle of Wight and drive to Shanklin, where this weeks parkrun is, along the esplanade. It's a lovely venue in the sunshine, with toilets available and a sizeable crowd gathering. Mark introduced himself to all the locals 😃

What followed was the longest parkrun intro I've ever heard which included a warmup and me giving my name and address to a lady who knits erm, egg cosys for barcode scanners (nope, me neither) anyway, Barking should be getting 2 soon. 

The course was literally an out and back with a bizarre first 200m loop which meant you saw the leaders coming at you about 5 seconds after you started! But settled in nicely with Mark who said he thought 27 minutes but was actually running comfortably at 5.15 ks. Finished in 25.07 albeit a bit of a short course. We then got knitted up for bike and went back to the cafe we had been running past minutes before for brekkie.

It was fine but we waited ages for a couple of the orders and all the while I was looking up. Looking up at the hill we had to climb out of Shanklin. Now, I know hill climbing is hard, but I also know I can grind them out, what I was worried about was the new pedal/cleat combo and turning a corner then not being able to clip in when you've suddenly got a massive bloody hill in front of you.

Still, you won't know if you don't try. 

Got on my bike in the car park, clipped one foot in went to stomp the other one round and nearly fell off cos the chain wasn't on. Great start! Paul put it back on for me, he was carrying gloves just for that purpose 😀. 

Rode round the car park for a while trying to get clipped in before I turned up the road cos it was most definitely up, finally did it and slowly span up the hill only almost co pletely stopping when I change the front ring by accident 😳 so you get to the top of that hill then a relatively flat bit for about 100m to a set of traffic lights that of course turn red as I get to them. Unclipping is dicey mainly because with my old ones you turned your foot in, these are out and it's not wired in yet, but I get there.

Lights turn green and I turn left scrabbling to clip in only to see just what I feared, a hill. So I stop. Get off and walk up it. I'm thinking here, 'ffs is this what it will be like all day? ' I'm feeling incredibly anxious and this isn't helping. But I carry on, and it's ok, until a few miles later in going downhill fast and see a line of cars in front of me on a narrow road. Oh I think, they must be parked but. Realise as I get closer they aren't, and have to do an emergency unclip, which almost undoes me. It's a temporary traffic light, on a steep downhill around a bend that I can't see. At this point, Andy, who must be the most patient friend I have says 'do you want to go back and not do this?' And he's quite right, I'm done with this already, I can't cope with riding 50 more miles shaking like a leaf. I don't really argue much, I know when I'm making the right decision, I don't want to hold everyone up and if there a part of ironman Andy won't struggle with it's the bike. So he informs the others and we head back to Shanklin, plus David who also had decided he wasn't in the right place for the ride round the island. 

We ride back and have a tea in the cafe, then head out for a few loops, lots of clipping in and out practice which is what I need, with at times someone behind me telling me I need to flip the pedal 😅

So the afternoon was spent round that area cycling around and it was fun. Less fun was not being able to get any warm clothes because Andys car key was in Pauls rucksack but never mind. It meant we were super pleased to see the rest of the group return about 5.30 😊

Oh yes Lesson 3...... Putting new pedals and cleats on, and trying them once in a traffic free environment is not really prep for an ultra hilly ride round the Isle of Wight.

Anyway, it was still fun and I'm glad I went.

I learnt a new lesson today.

Lesson 4...... Always double knot your laces before a race you fucking idiot!!!!!